So your significant other is a serious bicyclist and you're having trouble finding a holiday gift for them. You've come to the right place. If you aren't familiar with cycling yourself, you probably have more questions than answers:
Like, "How can a group of hundreds of sweaty guys that shave their legs and wear skin-tight technicolor spandex NOT seem gay?" Don't even get me started on embrocation or chamois cream. "It rubs the lotion on its skin."
Anyway, what were we talking about? Oh yeah, gifts for that hard to shop for cycling do-it-yourselfer on your list. The first thing you need to know is that there are different levels of licensed bicycle mechanics ranging from 1 to 4. Like Google's search engine, no one is quite sure how it works, but it appears that the mechanic's "level" seems to be inversely proportional to the number of parts that fall off their own bike during a race. The cobbler's children have no shoes.
So here are a few holiday gift ideas categorized on mechanic's classifications.
Repair Stand
Level #4 - We've all been there.
Level #3 - Extra points for effort.
Level #2 - Pretty much the 'Cadillac' of repair stands.
Level #1 - This particular model has been unavailable for some time, but according to People Magazine and Entertainment Tonight, will be back on the market shortly. Get your orders in soon.
Headset Press
This is one of the more delicate bicycle maintenance activities and should be handled with the most appropriate equipment.
Level #4 - We've been there too. The ultimate emergency trailside repair tool. The rock.
Level #3 - For those who have graduated up a level and possess the dexterity of a surgeon.
Level #2 - Don't laugh. Works great.
Level #1 - "Cadillac" model of headset press. Those of you who have both the Cadillac model headset press AND repair stand, you suck.
Honorable Mention - Not quite pressing it the right way to install a new headset, but I couldn't bring myself to tell her or say much else either.
Bike Washing
Level #4 - Get serious. We don't wash our bikes at this level unless we accidentally plunge head-first into a stream or a lake.
Level #3 - Good ol' elbow grease.
Level #2 - Portable Powerwasher - 12v or battery powered (Yeah, you've got one of these too. Gee whiz.)
Level #1 - Probably should take the bottle out of the cage to really get it clean. However, Dash Riprock would not allow this as only he can wash his bike correctly.
So, there you have it. Hopefully your favorite cyclist will have one or all of these underneath the tree this holiday season!
Man, I feel lucky. I got the repair stand, the headset press, the Campy chain tool, the Ritchey torque wrench, the ..... Either that or I really suck!
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