Sunday, January 3, 2010

The sky is falling

What do we do now?  2010 is here and we have less than 3 years before the 2012 apocalypse is on us like Dash Riprock on a Hoegaarden.  What can we do in the short time we have remaining on this planet?

The apocalypse is supposed to be right before Christmas 2012.  That's actually good news because we will get a full season of racing in 2012.  Three more seasons of racing CX.  That's something to consider.  What can a person accomplish in 3 seasons?  Quite a bit, actually, and if you decide to swig the Tyler Hamilton cocktail or rock the Floyd Landis signature chamois there is no limit to what you can accomplish.  You might even take the state championship title in the beer drinking dad category!

So we have three more seasons to accomplish something great in cyclocross before all traces of life are wiped from the earth.  And while its hard enough to plan 3 months down the road, much less 3 years, its worth setting some long term goals and making an effort to keep them in focus. And because it is so hard to personally plan for such a long term, I'm going to forget about planning my own goals and strive to accurately plan the goals for the Frites en Mayo Velo Club.

One of our long term goals should be our own Frites en Mayo Cyclocross Tour.  Currently the ACA has a monopoly on racing in Colorado and Frites is just the team to overthrow their position.  Nothing like some revolution before the revelation.

Another long term goal should be to get Matt Klick catted up to the Pro-1-2 level.  He's fast already and should be able to make the big boys suffer in a few years.  All he needs is a few people placed around the course at strategic locations to "discourage" the other riders.

And finally, we need to keep Frites alive after the apocalypse.  I suggest we find a cave and make a drawing of the team on the walls.  We can store Dash's carbon Alan bike in the cave along with Brian's garters, and my and Rich's broken and discarded parts.  We might need a second cave for that.  And when life finally returns to planet Earth, we will be considered the highest order of humanity, sort of like the Myan's of our time.

3 comments:

  1. OK - I won't beg, but I really want to join your club. First, the Apocalypse(Please ignore that creepy gibson movie - Apocalypto; it's really the introduction of the 5th man. you got F en M may well be the 5th man - a new and improved version. Second, I can cook many Mayan classics, Poc Chuc, Cochinita Pibil, I think you get it. Yes I know, the CIA is after me, I live in Boulder County. Look, I'll think about moving - if I do, I will get a real email account somewhere and contact you. Hasta la Proxima.

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  2. I was sort of hoping for something in the Mad Max genre. Then I realized, that movie wouldn't have been quite as cool on bicycles, even if the guy with the mohawk was riding a Primus Mootry.

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  3. Mad Max on bicycles would make a GREAT parody! We need to get a camera and shoot our own version!

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